Cockbag of the Week: What a bunch of monkey crotches

Cockbag central

Can it be, you say? Can a country itself become a cockbag?

Absolutely. Because if it were up to Pakistan, this thing we call "Cockbag of the Week" would cease to exist.

You see, Pakistan just released a list of words that it considers banned.

I'm not sure if cockbag makes an appearance, but I can't imagine it would pass freely through the Pakistani filter.

But, can you really ban a word out of existence? Of course not, but that's not stopping the Pakistani government from trying.

What they can do is make sure these words do not show up in text messages and other forms of communication popular with today's youth.

Some of these words they deem as obsene: Jesus Christ (really?), devil, flatulence, period, harder, queer, intercourse, athletes foot, condom, monkey crotch, and Wu Tang. for a full list click here



The Hip Hop scene in Islamabad will never be the same

Wait, Wu Tang? Yes, Wu Tang. So if cash rules everything around you, you may be shit out of luck.

If only Pakistan had a clause in their own constitution that protected speech. Wait ... they do?

Yup, Article 14 of the Pakistan Constitution states "every citizen shall have the right to freedom of speech and expression. ... subject to any reasonable restrictions imposed by law in the interest of the glory of Islam."

Oh, and words can't infringe on the "integrity," "decency" or "morality" of Pakistan. You mean the same Pakistan that may or may not have harbored Osama bin Laden for a few years? Yeah, we don't want to tarnish that good name of yours.

Pakistani Primates can no longer make dick jokes

So, yes and no it seems.

In Pakistan's case, you have this unalienable right, solid as stone, unflinching, unbreakable ... except when it's inconvenient.

That's not how it works, Pakistan.

This isn't the first time that this so-called freedom has been chipped away. In May 2010, Pakistan placed similar restrictions on Facebook and other corners of the Internet.

Let me level with you, Pakistan. The more you "ban" words, the more kids are going to want use them. The more you oppress people, the more they will revolt.

So, I will continue to exercise this wonderful thing we call free speech, and just because I may not like some of the disgusting words I hear every day ... like Santorum ... that doesn't mean that I want them banned. I think some old fart said something like that at some point.

In closing, Pakistan, I have one more thing to say to you: monkey crotch.

-Wes

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